I sometimes (ok, all the time) feel like we have two many choices as adults for what to do with out lives. This obviously has many perks, the idea you can be anything you want is powerful and of course allows many people to pursue their passions rather than just a job.
Years ago though, people took a job to pay the bills. More accurately, many years ago, men took the only job in the household to pay the bills. It was seldom the work dreams are made of (for either men or women) but it paid the bills so people took those jobs with much less fanfare than we do today.
Now, I personally feel Jay and I are both chasing these elusive dream jobs so hard, that we've lost sight of both what we need and what we actually dream of. Ten years ago I was sure I wanted to be a teacher (high school history, but kindergarten is still school!) and was confident that would make me happy. Doing the actual job, I know that I love working with children and youth, in any capacity but I am constantly thinking of a "better job" doing the same thing. Or of completely different office jobs, like one I already had and hated- but another one would be different, right?
I feel like the amazing opportunities afford to both Jay and I have both pushed us towards success and left us entirely unsure about how to find a career we can make a living with AND be happy.
Jay is currently in the last year of a 5 year commitment to a job that, he likes. Somedays he loves it, but mostly it ranges between mild and intense liking (likes?- having trouble conjugating this today).
That means that in a year, we are no longer obligated to live in Ottawa. We're planning to go back to Halifax, but the majority of young people are leaving NS to find work so it's hard to feel 100% confident in going back to a place that may hold no jobs. But, there are jobs in my field (lower pay than I'm currently making, but the cost of living is slightly lower as well).
Finding a job that meets Jays interests and skills may be more challenging however, as the Halifax job market may be much different. Coupled with the fact that I am usually 100% I don't want to work in this field, in this capacity forever, too much drama and not enough respect. How can a person be "usually 100% sure" or anything? Meh.
I think I could have been happy taking a job out of high school, getting married and having a family and living within our means. But instead I've got no idea what I want from life, a head filled with options. Some are realistic that could be amazing and fulfilling but many are just ridiculous! Having a manfriend who is feeling the exact same dazed and confused way is making for some interesting conversations at dinner.
We're a hot mess.
Like, taking frequent career aptitude tests kind of hot messes.
We live in an amazing time where people have many options, few doors are ever really shut to us. You can become famous on reality TV or singing competitions, go back to school at any age, gender is less of an issue in choosing a career path, training exists for nearly any career and with modern travel innovations you can take a job in other countries easily. This is all very exciting and very overwhelming!
The advent of all forms of social media probably has not helped this situation. Now, not only do we know these amazing opportunities exist but we can see all of our friends living that life. Of course they must be 100% contented all the time, it was on Facebook! It is far to easy to compare our lives to others now, without any context, which definitely contributes to my feelings of confusion.
Not sure if this post has a whiny feel today, or a poor-entitled-me quality. I tried to put the confused jumble of thoughts from my head into this post but I'm not confident it worked! I know we will both eventually take a breath and feel confident in our choices again, but lately we are just so lost!
How did you choose your career? Did you choose a career? Do you even think we need to cho0se careers? Ever have these feelings before?
*p.s I hope it's choose not chose- I won't lie I minored in English in school but you could never tell this morning. If you are upset by my grammar I can only say, "their,they're deer." BAHAHA. See what I did there?
Years ago though, people took a job to pay the bills. More accurately, many years ago, men took the only job in the household to pay the bills. It was seldom the work dreams are made of (for either men or women) but it paid the bills so people took those jobs with much less fanfare than we do today.
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| I searched "career quotes" and wasn't even sure where to start in finding a quote for this post. Just as we have too many options, we have too many sources of advice- some say follow your dreams other say manage every step. The bombardment never ends! |
I feel like the amazing opportunities afford to both Jay and I have both pushed us towards success and left us entirely unsure about how to find a career we can make a living with AND be happy.
Jay is currently in the last year of a 5 year commitment to a job that, he likes. Somedays he loves it, but mostly it ranges between mild and intense liking (likes?- having trouble conjugating this today).
That means that in a year, we are no longer obligated to live in Ottawa. We're planning to go back to Halifax, but the majority of young people are leaving NS to find work so it's hard to feel 100% confident in going back to a place that may hold no jobs. But, there are jobs in my field (lower pay than I'm currently making, but the cost of living is slightly lower as well).
Finding a job that meets Jays interests and skills may be more challenging however, as the Halifax job market may be much different. Coupled with the fact that I am usually 100% I don't want to work in this field, in this capacity forever, too much drama and not enough respect. How can a person be "usually 100% sure" or anything? Meh.
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| Perhaps we should pursue careers as impersonators? |
We're a hot mess.
Like, taking frequent career aptitude tests kind of hot messes.
We live in an amazing time where people have many options, few doors are ever really shut to us. You can become famous on reality TV or singing competitions, go back to school at any age, gender is less of an issue in choosing a career path, training exists for nearly any career and with modern travel innovations you can take a job in other countries easily. This is all very exciting and very overwhelming!
The advent of all forms of social media probably has not helped this situation. Now, not only do we know these amazing opportunities exist but we can see all of our friends living that life. Of course they must be 100% contented all the time, it was on Facebook! It is far to easy to compare our lives to others now, without any context, which definitely contributes to my feelings of confusion.
Not sure if this post has a whiny feel today, or a poor-entitled-me quality. I tried to put the confused jumble of thoughts from my head into this post but I'm not confident it worked! I know we will both eventually take a breath and feel confident in our choices again, but lately we are just so lost!
How did you choose your career? Did you choose a career? Do you even think we need to cho0se careers? Ever have these feelings before?
*p.s I hope it's choose not chose- I won't lie I minored in English in school but you could never tell this morning. If you are upset by my grammar I can only say, "their,they're deer." BAHAHA. See what I did there?
Keep Smiling :)
My husband and I each counted the other night how many jobs we've had since we graduated from college. That was 6 years ago. I've had 14 jobs since then. FOURTEEN. My parents called me a fish out of water. I've always KNOWN what I wanted to do, but actually getting PAID to do it was pretty much impossible. My husband also has always known what he wanted to do (coach football)--but like me, it took him working for free for a few years to make it happen. I paid the bills then. Now he pays the bills while I chase after my dream. I think our society puts a lot more emphasis on being happy with our work now than it ever used to--which might be why we're all so convinced we have to have "big dreams." Sometimes just having a job is the dream.
ReplyDeleteThat last sentence sums it all up so perfectly! A job, any job can make a huge difference in quality of life so sometimes it really doesn't matter what you're doing.
DeleteIt's so great you were able to find a way to support each other to pursue something you are passionate about! I love football so your husband pretty much has the coolest job ever!
I think I mentioned this to you before, but my dad said something to me once when I was a hot "what will I do with my life" mess, as you well know.
ReplyDelete"a job is just a job, and it shouldn't define your life, or be the center of your happiness" Which I think is really good advice, but having said that you do want a job that you're happy with as you spend most of your day doing it.
It is great advice, I do remember that conversation but I had forgotten he said that!
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